Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Rzeznik's research on the Mat Rempit Menace (Part 4)

Well if anyone outside there really doesn't know whether he is a Mat Rempit or not, kindly go through this check-list.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A MAT REMPIT IF:

1. You have less than RM5 in your wallet

2. You think you have a job

3. Your idea of biker wear is jeans, t-shirt and japanese slippers

4. You think you are superman

5. You think helmets are used during rain to cover your head from getting wet

6. You have tons of biker friends that speak a language that only you understand

7. You think your bike is the most powerful bike in the world

8. Your soon to be girlfriend would have at least slept with 7 of your friends

9. Your current girlfriend is sleeping with 4 of your friends

10. You bet your girlfriend during races cause you only have RM1 for teh tarik later

11. You can maintain a cup of teh tarik for a minimum of 4 hrs before you order another

12. You only need RM10 for the weekend (RM5 for petrol and RM5 for bfast, lunch and dinner)

13. You dont know how to interpret traffic signs

14. You cant understand the traffic light colours and the meaning

15. You dont know how to use your turn signal indicator

16. You think you are smart

17. You loiter with your friends outside some clubs (cant go in cos no money)

18. You shop at the bundle store

19. You love to loiter around any kinda entrance

20. You sit in the "mencangkung" position while loitering

21. Your gf=A1=A6s panties stick out while they're riding pillion

22. You share a pack of cigarette and a can of Coke with 35 of your friends

23. Your gf would leave you for a 4-wheeler anytime

24. You are ugly and dumb

25. You have an ekor hairstyle

26. You only know how to ride a bike (cant afford the car)

27. You wear a cheap metal bracelet

28. You go to gigs and later have an orgy with your friends

29. Your orgy involves 30 rempits and your gf (in some abandoned building)

30. You run when you see the Edisi Siasat crew

31. Your gf aborts her baby in the toilet once in awhile

32. Your bike is much more expensive than your house

33. You live in a 3 room terrace house with 15 other guys

34. You like to sit in the RM1 per song karoke booths and sing

35. You rather spend money on your bike than to buy your gf a bra from the pasar malam

36. You are pissed that the rokok batangs are no where to be found anymore

37. You can't afford to smoke Dunhill

38. You are impotent

38. You are pissed with this article

2 comments:

j9ker said...

"dua puluh sen lah"...i takde duit la.."sepuluh sen pun jadi lah"...

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